Can You Vague That Up For Me?

Welcome to the corner of Quirky and Kinky where you'll fall in love every time you open a book.

Why not me?!

So I’m talking to my friend today and the following conversation was had:

Her: So, do you want to hate my husband with me?

Me: I’m game. What’s up?

Her: Do you want to know what his sole job is at work today? (The man works making gourmet ice cream that none of the rest of us can afford to eat.)

Me: Will it piss me off?

Her: Definitely.

Me: Bring it.

Her: His sole purpose at work today is to sit and eat chocolate. Piles and piles of chocolate, sent from all around the world. He’s going to sit around and stuff his face with expensive chocolate and decide which kinds they’re going to use in upcoming flavor creation.

Me: Chocolate…all day.

Her: Oh yeah, baby. Swiss chocolate, German chocolate, dark chocolate, super dark chocolate…it’s a fucking chocolate festival and there’s none for me!

Me: I am feeling hateful. And also premenstrual.

Her: I know, right?

I feel her pain. I’m cranky, and I think I might have missed my calling. I can’t help but think a panel of chocolate testers would be better. I wonder if it’s too late for a career change…

Single Post Navigation

7 thoughts on “Why not me?!

  1. We can only hope that next week, the ice cream company is making something yukky, like garlic ice cream, and they make him taste that.


  2. Can he receive congical lunch visits from you?



  3. I suppose he's eating strawberries and sipping champagne to cleanse his palate between samples, too.


  4. He might come away from it hating chocolate. Or get a major headache. Could happen…


  5. @ Margaret – or turnip ice cream…

    @ Genella – no conjugal visit as it's my friend's husband…not mine. 🙂

    @ Chris – He probably was. The big jerk…

    @ Brynn – Apparently, he thoroughly enjoyed his day.


  6. Well there goes that theory…


  7. OMG

    I want, no must have, the chocolate job… Hey I'm PMS Too!!!

    I'll hate from afar, even if I don't know his name. I think I'm going to go and make a chocolate vodoo doll. yup, and I'll same some chipits for… well, you know.



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: