Can You Vague That Up For Me?

Welcome to the corner of Quirky and Kinky where you'll fall in love every time you open a book.

My Child, the Medieval Weapons Specialist

We’re a Nerf family. I can tell you the differences between the Nerf Longstrike, the Recon and the Raider Rapid Fire CS-35. I’m not entirely convinced this is something I should be proud of, but I live in a house full of people who think nothing of ambushing one another from around corners, on the stairs or from beneath the dining room table, so it’s important to know what’s going on.

The cats think the guns were designed for them to play hi-tech games of pounce and fetch. It’s not unusual for me to wake up in the middle of the night with a cat chasing a little foam dart on top of my bed, or a cat dropping a dart on my face because he wants to play fetch at 3 am.

You cannot imagine the level of unbridled joy experienced in my home when it was discovered that Nerf not only makes every size and shape dart gun imaginable, but has also branched out into melee weapons. Seriously, it was like the second coming around here.

Christmas brought many new Nerf additions into our home. And all of them accompanied Corwin to an overnight birthday party yesterday. He was beyond thrilled when he found a mace for the birthday boy. I dropped off Corwin with the mace, 3 swords, 3 shields, a battle ax, a tomahawk and an apology.

It’s not often that I feel the need to beg forgiveness before my child even crosses the threshold of someone’s house. But as he bounced from foot to foot babbling about hand to hand combat and the benefits of blades vs. blunt weapons, it seemed necessary. Luckily, Corwin’s been BFFs with this kid for the last eight years and he’s basically the same make, different model as my kid, so I knew his parents wouldn’t be too bent. Still, the kid’s mom looked a little relieved when I showed up to pick up Corwin and his weapons cache this afternoon, leaving her kid brandishing his new mace on the stairway. I like to think of it as spreading the joy. Yeah, I know. I’m probably going to hell for okaying that birthday gift.

Single Post Navigation

10 thoughts on “My Child, the Medieval Weapons Specialist

  1. That sentence detailing the weapons you left him there with, along with the apology, makes me laugh every time I read it. 🙂

    Like

  2. *can't comment* *howling with laughter*

    zomg zomg zomg… I've got one of those makes… sort of the hyped up Chevy of hand to hand combat–he and his BFF like to go into the back yard, fetch big sticks and reenact the battle of WhoCares vs. Doesn'tMatter–it's all in hitting each other with sticks!

    Like

  3. hahahha. Gotta spread the loooove ya know? I remember Nerf stuff but wow…ADVANCES in the the Nerf World.

    Like

  4. We have nerf wars here too. And though nobody has the melee weapons, there has been much coveting of them!

    Like

  5. I shall be purchasing these “toys” immediately despite the fact that the only human occupants of my home and myself and my husband.

    Like

  6. In my house, you walk in and at any given time, there is bound to be one or more children spread out on the floor in a dramatic death pose while others scatter off, coveting their 'homemade' gun of choice. Even Syd and Brynn had made cardboard ones. I basically just check for blood…as long as the floor is clean, we're good.

    Of course, they all count to ten and get 'resurrected'. Yeah, I remind them constantly not to enlist.. pretty sure there's no resurrection feature in the military.

    Gotta love boys and all they create!

    Like

  7. @ Chris – there's something very humbling about having to drop off your kid with an apology.

    @ Amy – Yes! You clearly know of what I speak! I'm so glad that I'm not navigating this particular mothering terrain alone. 😀

    @ Molly – thanks! 🙂

    @ Regina – The Nerf stuff is crazy! Sometimes hubby brings stuff to work to ambush coworkers.

    @ Cindy – Get them!! You know you want to!!!

    @ Sweet Vernal Zephyr – you won't be sorry. Hubby and I dual with the swords – of course, it usually ends up being a four person battle.

    Like

  8. Wow. Since I don't have that make of child, I didn't realize that Nerf had branched out. That said, Bug is now thinking that melee weapons would be a great addition to our household.

    Like

  9. Nice .makes me laugh every time I read it.Swords

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: