Soul Mates? Love at First Sight? Fate? Destiny? – Taking on the big questions. Or perhaps just rambling incoherently. You be the judge.
So this week, we’re tackling questions like whether or not we believe in the existence of things like soul mates or love at first sight.
Let’s start with the concept of love at first sight. The short answer is: nope.
The slightly longer answer is that I totally think that lust at first sight is totally a thing – but not love. I think you can have a strong connection with someone you’ve just met. Certainly enough of a connection want to get to know them better or to find a convenient place to have sexy times. But I also don’t believe that sex = love. I believe that love is more of a gradual process. Attraction can be instantaneous, but love requires more time to get to know someone. It also requires discovering their faults and realizing that the positive outweighs the negative.
Next up is Soul Mates. Now, I guess this one depends on your definition of the idea of soul mates, but going with the common idea of there’s exactly one perfectly perfect person out there for everyone. Short answer: Nope.
The slightly longer answer for this one is that I think there are plenty of people out there that we can love deeply and truly and have that love returned. I don’t think there’s only one person and one person only. And I also don’t think the idea of soul mates is strictly reserved for romantic love. I think friends can have that sort of soul-deep connection, too.
The even longer answer is that I do believe in the idea of past lives and soul mates in that sense of the term. (Yes, I know. Crunchy Granola Hippie Alert!) But, I think that we often reincarnate with the same group of souls because we’re all learning and figuring out our shit together. And for me that’s the more accurate definition of soul mate rather than one person for everyone.
And lastly, is Fate and Destiny. Again with the short answer: Nope.
Often you hear that phrase, “(wasn’t) meant to be” and, hell, I’m guilty of saying it myself. I think “(wasn’t) meant to be” is a more of a platitude than anything else. We say it when things don’t work out the way we’d like to comfort ourselves. We say it when things do work out because we wanted to believe that there’s some order in the universe and that something was fated or destined to work out in a certain way.
But I believe we all have that nifty little thing called freewill. And having freewill and exercising it means we can affect the outcome of events in our lives. And yes, some things are out of our control, and a lot of those things aren’t great – debilitating diseases, accidents, random acts of violence, but that doesn’t mean they’re fated to happen. I don’t believe we’re all wandering around, acting out the pre-written script for our lives.
For instance, I don’t believe that today was the day that I was fated to step in cat puke and nearly fall down the basement stairs. Had I put on my damn glasses so I could see where I was going, I would have avoided the pile of pukiness. But instead, I exercised my freewill and walked down the stairs blind because I was too lazy and tired and chose not to put on my glasses.
So…super short answer to all of these mysteries of the universe: Nope.
What are your thoughts on any of the above topics? I’d love to hear them! And check out the other bloggers’ thoughts on the topics by clicking on their names.